In an ideal world, you\u2019ve got a satisfying career with plenty of time and energy to play with your kids, help with homework, exercise and catch up with your friends. The reality? You\u2019re exhausted from toiling harder and longer just to keep your job and it\u2019s taking a toll. You\u2019re time-crunched, short-tempered and wound so tight that even relaxing takes effort. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sound familiar? You\u2019re not alone. \u201cIn today\u2019s competitive culture, there\u2019s greater stress on an internal and external level,\u201d says psychoanalyst Ann Chanler, Ph.D. The more that\u2019s expected of us, the more we demand from ourselves to be the best wife, multitasking mom and caring friend because we don\u2019t want to let anything slide. But feeling frazzled and the ripple effects on your professional and personal life aren\u2019t fun for anyone or healthy for you over the long run. Something\u2019s gotta give. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But what? We tapped work\/life experts like Chanler and working moms like you for their top sanity-saving tips on how to rebalance the balancing act.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Put you at the top of your to-do list.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIf you don\u2019t take care of yourself first, you won\u2019t be able to do a good job of taking care of everybody,\u201d says Chanler, herself the mother of two teenage daughters. She likens self-care for parents <\/strong>to the oxygen mask demonstration on airplanes. Although it feels counterintuitive, you\u2019re instructed to strap your mask on first, before your child\u2019s. That means that if, for example, you have a choice between returning e-mail or strolling with your baby, take the walk. Block out an hour each week for yourself and arrange your own play dates at least once a month, too. \u201cParenting can be isolating but other moms can give you help with issues you\u2019re facing and make you realize you\u2019re not alone. Friends who don\u2019t have kids can help you connect with a part of yourself that existed before you had a family,\u201d Chanler says. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Think less is more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For a greater sense of calm, ask yourself: What can I nix from my to-do list? Then choose one thing to delete from that day\u2019s or week\u2019s agenda. Ah.<\/em> Also, stop multitasking. \u201cCreate a schedule when you\u2019ll work, take care of the kids, spend time with your spouse and concentrate only on the task at hand. Ask yourself: What should I be doing now and do only that,\u201d says Leah Aharoni, a managing director at a translation agency and mom of six. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Snooze away stress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cTo manage stress, you have to be well-rested,\u201d says Savitri Dixon-Saxon, Ph.D., associate dean of the Walden University School of Counseling and Social Services, an online university. Lack of shut-eye increases your body\u2019s production of cortisol, a stress hormone, so try to log in six to eight hours of sleep each night. Your brain needs the down time. A study in the Journal Sleep<\/em> found that people who slept that much performed the best on tests that assessed cognitive function, memory, reasoning, and vocabulary tests. Sleep is also the ultimate fatigue fighter. Tip for a stress-free morning<\/strong>: log in more zzzz; turn off the TV and go to bed earlier. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Exercise your options.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Try to get in at least 30 minutes of daily exercise\u2014Mother Nature\u2019s reset button. To spend more time with your family while you\u2019re at it, be active together by going for walks, strolling after dinner or hiking or biking together on the weekends. Family time is so important in and of itself. If you can incorporate activity into it, it\u2019s a double bonus. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Catch your breath.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you\u2019re feeling overwhelmed, breathe in through your nose to the count of four, exhale through your mouth for a count of four, and so on, for four sets. \u201cDo this simple exercise in the car, in your office, or in the bathroom stall at work if you have to,\u201d says Karol Ward, a licensed clinical social worker in New York City. It helps you think clearly and regain your equilibrium. \u201cI breathe if I\u2019m anxious before phone calls or meetings, or before talking to my kids or my husband when I\u2019m tired. It changes everything,\u201d adds Diana Fletcher, a life coach and author of Happy on Purpose<\/em>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Eat well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A diet that\u2019s rich in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains, paired with healthy sources of lean protein like chicken and fish provides the variety of nutrients you need to cope with stress and the energy you need to multitask. Instead of resorting to take-out (again), use the weekends to plan menus, shop, batch-cook, and prep healthy meals and snacks for the week. To create even more time, \u201cOnce a week, make a crock-pot meal,\u201d suggests Cristin Frank, a writer and mom of two. \u201cThe night before, portion out ingredients so you can toss them into the slow cooker in the morning. You\u2019ll only have one pot to clean at the end of the night.\u201d Bonus!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Don\u2019t be the clean queen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Full-time working women do over 33 hours of domestic chores weekly, while their male counterparts do about 16, according to a study published in Women Don\u2019t Ask<\/em>, by Linda Babcock, professor of economics at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. To end the dreaded second shift, let some of the housework slide or ask your spouse and your kids for help. Doing chores actually helps build a child\u2019s sense of competence. If your standards are exacting, lower them. So what if the sheets don\u2019t get changed as often or your husband misses a spot when he\u2019s dusting the furniture? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Take notes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Use a day planner to write down appointments, reminders, bright ideas and your daily to-do list. \u201cIt allows your mind to rest because you know you won\u2019t forget anything important,\u201d says Renee Metzler, a life organizational coach and fellow mom in the trenches. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Create a day-is-done ritual, a self-imposed boundary between work and home that\u2019s designed to bring closure to the end of your work day. One example: Take a shower at home after work and imagine your problems of the day disappearing down the drain, says John Brubaker, a work-life balance consultant. After that, you\u2019ll feel more ready to give your family your full attention.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Determine your stress triggers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Is it having too much to do? Having to work on the weekends? \u201cOnce you understand the root cause of your stress, you can take positive steps to cope by avoiding thoughts, behaviors and activities that increase your anxiety,\u201d says Soroya Bacchus, Ph.D., a board-certified psychiatrist in Los Angeles. One temper-taming tactic: \u201cTry to stack more labor-intensive assignments and those that require others\u2019 input early in the week and taper down so that by Friday you can essentially focus on housekeeping tasks,\u201d says Ellen Schack, a work\/life balance expert at www.theceocouple.com<\/a>. \u201cThis strategy can help you avoid weekend workloads and other infringements on what should be your personal time.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Finally, savor the good times.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In an ideal world, you\u2019ve got a satisfying career with plenty of time and energy to play with your kids, help with homework, exercise and catch up with your friends. The reality? You\u2019re exhausted from toiling harder and longer just to keep your job and it\u2019s taking a toll. 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