{"id":3463,"date":"2025-10-13T01:34:30","date_gmt":"2025-10-13T01:34:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/?p=3463"},"modified":"2025-10-13T01:34:31","modified_gmt":"2025-10-13T01:34:31","slug":"young-love-healthy-or-not-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/?p=3463","title":{"rendered":"Young Love: Healthy or Not?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u2026And then you\u2019re on your very first date
And he\u2019s got a car
And you\u2019re feeling like flying
And your mama\u2019s waiting up
And you\u2019re thinking he\u2019s the one
And you\u2019re dancing around the room when the night ends
When the night ends<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Cause when you\u2019re fifteen,
Somebody tells you they love you
You\u2019re gonna believe them
And when you\u2019re fifteen<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And your first kiss makes your head spin around<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

But in your life you\u2019ll do things
Greater than dating the boy on the football team
But I didn\u2019t know it at fifteen<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

When all you wanted
Was to be wanted
Wish you could go back
And tell yourself what you know now<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 From \u201cFifteen\u201d by Taylor Swift<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Songs abound on the radio about young love and all its highs and lows. Memories of your first love stay with you. Sweet reflections of talking all night on the phone, your first kiss, and believing you would be together forever. You probably remember the breakup, too, because teenage romances rarely last long-term. When your own children start dating and experiencing those early relationships \u2013 along with the accompanying ups and downs \u2013 what role do you have? How much should you worry about them being \u201cin love\u201d as a teen or young adult? It is a delicate matter to be sure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to Dr. Dean Beckloff<\/strong>, licensed counselor and founder of the Beckloff Behavioral Health Center<\/a>, the key is to listen. \u201cMost people listen to respond rather than listening to understand,\u201d Beckloff suggests. When it comes to talking to young people about their relationships, \u201cyou are there to hear and not judge,\u201d he says. \u201cConnect with what they may be thinking, believing, and what they may be feeling.\u201d You can help them filter through their own thoughts as you listen. It is very natural too, he says, for teens to communicate more with one parent than the other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And they called it puppy love
Oh I guess they\u2019ll never know
How a young heart, how it really feels
And why I love her so<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And they called it puppy love
Just because we\u2019re seventeen
Tell them all
Oh please tell them it isn\u2019t fair
To take away my only dream<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 From \u201cPuppy Love\u201d by Paul Anka (re-recorded by Donny Osmond)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Research has shown that dating can build self-esteem and social skills as well as teach kids about healthy relationships, but how young is too young? Dr. Beckloff says that it is ultimately up to each family to decide, but young teenage romances are not necessarily bad. \u201cThe younger they are, the more controls they have,\u201d Beckloff reminds parents. Younger teens can begin learning about relationships with more guidance from parents at home. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Having \u201cdating rules\u201d from parents also gives the teenager some safeguards or excuses to use to get out of situations that they are not ready for or that make them uncomfortable.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Those early relationships usually involve a lot of time on the phone and seeing each other only at school or group events. Once they or their significant other turns sixteen and can drive, the game changes somewhat. There is a lot less supervision, so it is important for parents to ensure they have established their expectations. \u201cBy the time they get to college, they have more maturity, and you just hope they are making more mature decisions,\u201d Dr. Beckloff says. That doesn\u2019t mean, however, that they don\u2019t still need you to be a listening ear.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nothing really matters
I don\u2019t really care
What nobody tell me
I\u2019m gonna be here
It\u2019s a matter of extreme importance
My first teenage love affair<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 From \u201cTeenage Love Affair\u201d by Alicia Keys<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

What do you do when you have real concerns about the relationship? According to Dr. Beckloff, \u201cParents have to work hard at not panicking when they see negative or concerning behaviors or red flags,\u201d though he recognizes that is hard to do. If at all possible, he suggests first waiting to see if \u201cnature takes its course\u201d because he warns parents they could push their child in the wrong direction. They do still need guidance from parents, but he points to the \u201cI hate you\/Don\u2019t leave me\u201d dilemma kids face. Sometimes they recognize they still need their parents but don\u2019t necessarily want to hear their advice. \u201cParents ultimately do need to share concerns, understanding the teenager or young adult may reject them at first but may consider your words later and move in that direction,\u201d Dr. Beckloff suggests.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Summer after high school when we first met\u2026
Talk about our future like we had a clue
Never planned that one day I\u2019d be losing you<\/em>
In another life
I would be your girl
We\u2019d keep all our promises
Be us against the world
In another life
I would make you stay
So I don\u2019t have to say you were
The one that got away<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 From \u201cThe One That Got Away\u201d by Katy Perry<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Rarely do teenage romances last. According to a study by Brandon Gaille Marketing, today only two percent of marriages are from a high school relationship. Dr. Beckloff says kids use words like \u201cforever\u201d even before they fully comprehend what that means. Thinking the relationship will last forever, they may have an especially difficult time when it comes to an end. \u201cIt can be devastating,\u201d Beckloff says. \u201cA breakup can create real grief whether they are the one who breaks up or is broken up with.\u201d It is important that parents recognize that grief and not trivialize the child\u2019s emotions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the midst of the pandemic, it may be even more difficult to see relationships end. Dr. Beckloff says, \u201cWe certainly have a lot of depression in our high school kids and college-age students these days. It seems it\u2019s gotten harder to maintain all of our relationships, so breakups can be even harder if the teen or young adult is already somewhat depressed.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, what are the best ways to support your child<\/strong>? After a breakup, he suggests you should tell your kids, \u201cI\u2019m here, and we\u2019re going to get through it.\u201d  Once again, your role is to listen and not judge. It is important to let them know they are not alone. \u201cListen to music,\u201d he says. \u201cWhy do you think there are so many songs about breakups?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That creates an entirely new playlist.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2026And then you\u2019re on your very first dateAnd he\u2019s got a carAnd you\u2019re feeling like flyingAnd your mama\u2019s waiting upAnd you\u2019re thinking he\u2019s the oneAnd you\u2019re dancing around the room when the night endsWhen the night ends \u2018Cause when you\u2019re fifteen,Somebody tells you they love youYou\u2019re gonna believe themAnd when you\u2019re fifteen And your first […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"content-type":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[19],"class_list":{"0":"post-3463","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-uncategorized"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"publishpress_future_action":{"enabled":false,"date":"2026-05-23 23:21:45","action":"change-status","newStatus":"draft","terms":[],"taxonomy":"category","extraData":[]},"publishpress_future_workflow_manual_trigger":{"enabledWorkflows":[]},"authors":[{"term_id":19,"user_id":1,"is_guest":0,"slug":"admin_7odr8iqj","display_name":"admin","avatar_url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1feee162e18d4afc874b0031f2d89eb6bdad45c74ffc261dcdf93c2cd863d4d2?s=96&d=mm&r=g","0":null,"1":"","2":"","3":"","4":"","5":"","6":"","7":"","8":""}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3463","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3463"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3463\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3464,"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3463\/revisions\/3464"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3463"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3463"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3463"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodlife247.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fppma_author&post=3463"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}